Is your life worth watching?

"One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure its worth watching."
- Anon

Last week, when I came upon this quote, it helped ease some sadness.  I lost a very dear person to me.  Although, we hadn’t spoken in years, I always kept a warm place in my heart for him.  Then, finding out that he had battled an illness for years and lost was both surreal and shocking.  However, as I read his obituary, I had come to found out that he had a wife, two kids and continued to enjoy his love of music.  This part made the ache feel a bit better.  Matt was an amazing, energetic, and electric drummer, who had such a passion for playing and creating music.  He will be missed.  

Knowing (and feeling) that he lived a good, rich life eased the sadness I was feeling.

However, you really can get whacked in the face with your mortality when someone young and/or close to you dies, especially if you had a history with them.  I learned a lot from the relationship we shared, and it contributed so much to my personal growth in my present relationships, as well as with myself.  
The day after I found out he passed (which was a day after he literally left his body), I shot up in bed at 5:15am and sensed him.  He was on my mind, and I believe that when someone who has passed on fills your thoughts and vision, they are lingering there.  

It was a very profound, peaceful, and bittersweet moment.  Tears of sadness and joy washed over me and I knew I had to be present for these emotions.  Here.  Now.  I allowed myself to let go and say good-bye.  Although it hurt me, it comforted me at the same time.  

I knew he left happy and complete as he ever could be.  I’m sure as his life flashed before his eyes, he was like, “Damn.  That’s cool!”  I hope when my spirit moves on, I have feelings of love, compassion, acceptance and gratitude.  I know this can be a dark, and often, unpleasant subject for some, but when loved ones pass on, it should be a time for celebrating their life.  We must embrace all the feelings that arise and not rush through them.   

It’s a process.  And, with like most processes, they need attention.  Sometimes, there are processes that are more painful and difficult.  So that’s why family, friends, and a supportive community can help ease you along the way.  

I'm grateful for what I have in my life -- people, experiences, even jobs!  

What are you grateful for RIGHT NOW in this MOMENT?  What if you knew you didn't have a moment left?  What would you do? Say?


Good food for thought.....