Trust and you shall receive

For years, it was really hard for me to trust myself and the decisions I made. I usually just went along with what everyone else did because it was just easier that way. No one would say anything or question me. Then I met my husband and it all changed. When we are talking about what we want to do for the evening or over the weekend or what to cook for dinner, if he decided something, I would just agree. He immediately would pick up on this and say, "Well, what do you want?" I would respond, "What you said. That sounds fine." Then he would said, "No, really. What would you like to do/eat?" This would start to send me into anxiety mode and I would start getting all flustered. And for what? This was the question on his face, and in later years, the question reflected right back to me.

Of course, over the past 4-5 years, I've learned to really check in with myself when questions or ideas are presented to me. I also have learned not to say, "yes" to everything because, in the past, that led to overbooking my time, leaving me with no time for what I wanted to do. Even if it was nothing! But allowing myself time and space to think and feel about choices is just one of things that yoga offers us. It's that quiet time that we give ourselves in meditation that allows us to connect with that deeper part of ourselves. It's the essence and the spirit/soul. It's trust and love.

I am ALLOWING myself to TRUST my intuition MORE around what I want to do along my path. Because it is MINE. Right?

It's not my mom's, my dad's, that ex-boyfriend's, the governments; it IS all mine. It's about what I want for myself in my relationships, health, career and business. Not what I should have, or HAVE to do.

For instance, I had an interview at a health club for a Massage Therapist position. This health club is very exclusive in the San Francisco Bay Area, and being located in the Financial District, it caters to the corporate community. I was early for my interview, and as I sat drinking my peppermint tea, I people-watched. "Wow" I said to myself. In the past, I would have said, "What am I doing here?!" with a lot of contempt. I also would have had the nervous flutters of butterflies in my stomach, but instead I was relaxed, comfortable, and going-with-the-flow. The chatter said, "Something must be wrong!" But in my heart, everything was perfect. The interview went so well, they asked me back for a practicum to demo my skills. I walked out of there feeling so confident and joyful! Then I recalled that email the day before from another business contacting me to come in for an interview and demo, and I my joy factor went from a 10 to a 100,000!

I'm realizing how manifestation and intention works, AND I'm receiving it! When an opportunity comes along, I'm open. I'm VERY aware when the chatter may chime in, but I know it's not true and it's not who I am or want. I'm trusting what comes and I'm not afraid of failure.

I welcome all opportunity and possibility. I listen to my intuition and heart because that's who I am.

I am not my thoughts. YOU are not your thoughts.

Trust in yourself and you will receive what you asked or prayed to the universe or higher being. You deserve it. So believe it!